I love reading books, I do, but I’m not going to review them. That takes too much time. I just wanna read read read.
I’m sitting in class right now and slacking off. Honestly, I have a midterm in what? One day? NAWW…. I’ma chill and leave the studying for tomorrow. as much as I love math, I hate studying.
Okay, I haven’t written anything in forever so I’ll try to recap most of my life. Before sophomore year, I genuinely liked school. As nerdy as that sounds, it was really fun. Now, at the end of sophomore year, I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.
ARGHH… I still like to learn, I just don’t enjoy all this extra stress. I mean, come on! 2 all nighters in a row? How is that even reasonable? Well, obviously my teachers thought so. I mean, they gave enough homework to keep me up. That was the biggest change for me: not being motivated. And this attitude carried on throughout all the activities I did.
I was pretty unmotivated in everything. I’ll start from the top. I started my year out with tennis. I didn’t make varsity, which was not that bad, but I did have my fingers crossed. Instead, I was JV captain. Which, I did not get because I was the best or anything. Just because I’m louder than half the people there. LOL. I played pretty badly. I could hit well in the beginning of the season, but I got worse and worse. I attribute that to the fact that I was anemic for that whole time, but honestly, that was just an excuse. I was Debby-the-downer last year. I was pretty happy when I got MVP though. But I don’t think I deserve it. I didn’t really play as good and didn’t try as hard as I did freshman year.
Next. So as many of you do not already know, I used to hangout by the bathrooms during freshman year with Cynthia and Mazie. Yup, freshmen generally do not get tables. We had lots of people come and go between us, but it was pretty peaceful with just us three (and Alfonso most of the time). So this year we tried really hard to get a table. And we did, only to get it stolen. Table wars broke out with moving the table across and back over the campus and in the end our group: Mae, Cyn, Vilan, Alfonso, and I think Alex? got combined with another group at a table.
LOL. It was so awkward. I didn’t know ANY of their names at all! It took us a while, but we got closer, and now, they are my peeps (if ya kno what I mean). Brenda, Jasmine, Princess Jasmine, Carly and Mary. We had the best times ever at the end of the school year. Random hot guy talks, parties, and GOSSIP. That was a highlight of my year.
Another close bond that I made was with Renee. Dude. She was scarrry the first time I saw her. VERY VICIOUS. Just kiddin. I’m oblivious to people half the time. To be honest, I was just like: “Hey! You’re in Dance!” She said she thought I was annoying at first. I was kind of insulted at that at first so I lied with a “Me, too.” But I got over myself. My sister tells me how annoying I am all the time, I was just in denial till then. The first step to recovery: acknowledgement. SO Renee! If you are reading this. Now you know I was lying, you weren’t annoying the first time I saw you. Well anyways, I spent a lot of time talking/camming Renee and I can’t wait to have her in dance again next year.
NOW… A NON-HIGHLIGHT of my year. I always talk about this to Renee. I’m close to my siblings and my friends, but my cousins and I are really far from close. I used to be close to one, but she changed so much. I know this is really stupid to write up everything here, but I honestly am fed up. I love her, I do, but she’s so mean. Every time I see her, it’s another snarky comment. I have my limits, I will blow up at some point. I let them go most of the time, but now, I don’t even want to go see my family anymore. No one on that side is genuinely nice. There are little jabs stuck in to insult you. There are some nice family members over there, but they are so quiet about it, that the pride overpowers. Maybe I’m naive and being nice is stupid, but I’m so angry when I leave any family visits. I already know I’m going to hear an insult of some sort when I go there. I mean, is that REALLY what I’m supposed to do? Prep myself to hear something not nice every time I have to come over to visit FAMILY? I don’t know. I’m just avoiding everyone now. I wish we could all have fun together. TOGETHER. Not separated between adults and children, but together. I want it so everyone will stop acting like they are too good for everyone else. Let loose. Have fun. Watch tv all laid out in the living room, go to the park and run around, sit in a bedroom and try on clothes. SOMETHING! I will never have a family like that side. I will make sure that my family will have more love than pride. Everyone will be equal. No power struggles. No prideful struggles. I know, my family isn’t perfect, but we can still sit in the kitchen together and pull out jokes. My sister can still hit my butt and hide. My brother can still hug me to get favors. My mom can still try to find out the name of the guy I like, and my dad can still sit there and listen to me drone on and on about my favorite book. We love each other for what we are without putting up fronts. OKAY! done with the long boring stuff.
On to other major events. Dance. For the dance recital, I admit, I was kind of over the top. I was talking about it non-stop. I’m sorry. I’ve just been pining for dance lessons since I was younger, and it felt great to actually get to perform. Sadly, I hurt my knee. I think I was mad for like that whole day. ARGH. But I got over it. I’m pretty beginner at dance, but I love it, so I hope I’ll be dancing forever! Oh and I was in Jenny’s Dance! Oh my gosh! It was beautiful. I hope I get to do something like that later again.
School: I think I fell out of it in the last couple of months. I skipped class for like every other day. It was BAD. I didn’t do my homework either. Luckily I pulled through and got good grades for the second semester. The first semester was good, too. Just chemistry… sixth period…LOL. My favorite teachers for soph. year: BASICALLY ALL OF THEM! They were soo awesome! Mdme. Topping, Ms. Jensen, Ms. Shannahan/Ms. Mohundro, MR. HARRISON!!!, MS. NGUYEN!!!, and MR. SEALS. Such an eventful year-ish. More-so at the end.
